Your sexuality is your own, and like most things in life, we all exist on a spectrum of how comfortable we are with certain acts when it comes to sex.

We created Venus in Silk to be a sex shop that caters to the softer, more sensual, and more spiritual side of sexuality, while holding pleasure at the forefront of our message. And, we are here to tell you that you don't have to be into BDSM, Kink Clubs, Swinging, or anything else in order to 1. Use sex toys, and 2. Have an exciting, pleasure-filled, and erotic sex life. 

Also, we're here to tell you that you can still play out fantasies, have sexual kinks and explore aspects of BDSM in a soft-core way if full on BDSM is not for you. And if it is for you, or you want to explore it more, that's great too! Check out this article for things to try if you're new to BDSM.

Here are 5 soft-core ways you can spice up your vanilla sex life (vanilla is great, but sometimes you want to add chocolate syrup, or strawberry cheesecake, right?):

1. Invest in a sex toy (or two)

Introducing sex toys into your sex life is a fun, pleasurable, and exciting way to spice things up. If it's your first time bringing a sex toy into the bedroom and you're not sure where to start read our blog about 4 ways to use Vibrators with a Partner. Toys are generally safe, come in a range of styles, and can absolutely be used together with your partner. If you still feel uncertain about sex toys, you may want to check in with these Myths about Vibrator Use to see if any of them are what's holding you back. 

2. Use a Silk Scarf as a Blindfold or to Tie up Each Other's Hands

We are Venus in Silk, so of course we're going to recommend the ever versatile silk scarf, but any scarf will do. Silk scarves are soft, easy to tie lightly, and make for the perfect intro to bondage play. Getting teased by your partner while blindfolded, and giving up control in a light and fun way, will definitely take things up a notch in the bedroom. We also offer the chicest handcuffs you've ever seen for light bondage play with sophisticated flare.

3. Mirror Mirror

Have sex in front of the mirror. It's hot. You're hot. Your partner thinks you're hot. And watching yourselves be totally turned on and into each other from a new perspective (the mirror) is HOT.

4. Start Sexting throughout the Day

You know what else is hot? Anticipation. When you're busy, especially as parents, scheduled sex can become the norm. But, saying scheduled sex isn't hot is like saying having a reservation to your favorite restaurant isn't exciting. It is so important to schedule sex if being spontaneous about it falls flat most nights. On your next scheduled sex date, start the foreplay early by sending each other sexy messages throughout the day with "dirty" talk about what is to come. 

5. Dress up

This doesn't mean you have to engage in a full-on role playing, although that can be fun too! Sometimes all it takes to feel sexier and spice things up is some new lingerie. Maybe try some crotchless panties? Nipple tassels or clips? Or wear a vibrator necklace out to dinner so you can feel a little naughty about what's to come? Try adding something new to your accessory drawer, the possibilities these days are truly endless and even something as small as this can bring an extra spark to sex. 

Monogamous sex in a long-term relationship does NOT have to be boring! These are just a few ways you can spice things up. It's important to try new things, and there's really no better place than within the safety of a long-term intimate relationship. Want to try a ball gag? Do it! Actually didn't enjoy it? Don't do it again! Exploring your sexuality does not have to be scary. Take it slow to find out what you like and don't like. You never know what's on the other side of your habits and comfort zone.